I kinda fail at this..

So I've had this thing for a couple of months now, and I'm finding myself failing on posting regularly. I usually think about it, but by the time I have free time to do it, I forget. I guess since it doesn't rank that high on my to do list, I think it's something that I can do later. Plus I think it goes back to the whole nothing interesting to say tid bit. 

Life hasn't really changed much. Work is getting easier, though some days I just get tired of people yelling at me, and that can take a toll on you whenever you're stressed out about other things. But I like to think that those people will feel guilty about yelling at the poor girl who called them. It's really not our fault that we call you. Permission is given, and if you read the contracts you sign there is a part where they say that they will call you for feedback. Besides most of the time it's only a couple of questions and we sit there all day saying the same thing over and over, so we go through it pretty quickly. Please be nice to us. We only make minimum wage, and most of us hate the job, but we need it for various reasons. 

Some of those people though, I have to wonder how they can spend their lives so angry. A friend on Facebook posted a quote that for every moment spent angry, is another moment of happiness lost. Which I really do believe in. I know I get angry about things, but I don't let it consume my life. I don't know how people live like that. Course if they live like that then they probably don't have long life expectancies. 

I'm still waiting to move into my new apartment. I will be kinda sad to leave this one, since it was my first apartment, but I think that's more nostalgia. The other apartment is far better than this one in comparison. I just wish I could be let out of my lease earlier, since I move in Aug 1st, and my lease now ends Aug 14. Really two weeks, and that time can be used to re-paint and get the carpet cleaned, but whatever. Minor inconvenience I guess. 

It's the end of June, and I feel like I should be doing something for school. But I should be happy about the fact that I don't have that added stress on me. I have enough to worry about. I have to say though, I'm excited to get back to the womb of college. I'm afraid of when I graduate, and go into my career that I'll have a hard time adjusting. Maybe I'll be a lifelong academic. Which I have thought about. 

This past week has been nice though. A cousin from Indiana came to do orientation for Truman, and I'm excited for her to move here. Pretty much whenever she was born (I'm a year older :)), we were destined to be besties. Sure she lives an entire state away, but still, every time she comes I have a good time. I know some people find having their cousins as best friends may be weird and slightly pathetic, but I find that she gets me better than most, just because she knows how I grew up, and I know how she grew up. We know each other's way of thinking, and we share a love of our grandmother's cooking. I'm sad she's leaving, but she'll be back in a month and a half, and after that we have all the time in the world. 

So my life has gotten crazy and frustrating...

Really less crazy and more frustrating. I signed a lease for another apartment that I'll move into in August whenever the lease I'm in now ends. Now I understand why a landlord would want a lease. It basically gives them legal protection, and also I get some assurances as well. But it's frustrating whenever I want to move out of this one so badly, but yet I have to wait till August. Now I'll admit it was a good first apartment. The landlord was nice, he was my only neighbor, and the neighborhood was similar to the one I grew up in. But whenever you tell people that the apartment is the guy's basement, and that he lives upstairs, you get some weird stares. Yes, it is an odd situation. But I was desperate to get out of my parents house and this was my first viable option. But now that I have another apartment I'm waiting to get into, I can't help but notice differences.

Before I moved in, it was a newly wed couple who lived here, and how they did it I just don't know. First off, and most importantly, there aren't any counters. Seriously. I have a sink, a fridge, and a stove, all in an L shape, and it is so annoying. I have zero cook space. I would like to try to cook fabulous meals, but I have no room to prepare it on. There is a table, but it houses some miscellaneous things that don't really go anywhere else. There is only one set of cabinets. One above the sink and one below. Which I don't need much in the way of cabinet space, but it would be nice to have some space, and spread out my plates and cups. Then the cabinet below the sink houses the cleaning supplies. I had to by a plastic set of drawers so I could put my forks and knives somewhere, and it is a handy-dandy storage space. It's also set up awkwardly, the shower is so small I nearly break my legs trying to shave them, and there aren't any closets. So this place doesn't have much going for it. Did I mention it's a basement?

Also there's the whole job thing. I had to leave Picklers, which made me incredibly sad and mad. And left me scrambling. So now I'm at Maritz. I will give them this, the supervisors are pretty nice. I do know one person, and continue making friends, but honestly if something else came along, I would snatch it up in a heartbeat. I miss the interaction with my co-workers, and customers. Having to stick to a specific script and only being allowed to say certain things, it gets frustrating. There was a sign in Hastings about needing someone, which I applied for, and hope I get. Only 2 weeks at Maritz and I already am wanting something else. It pays well, and I get the hours that I want, but still, I miss being able to talk to my co-workers while working. Maybe I've been spoiled by my last jobs.

So yeah, basically it feels like the weight of the world on my shoulders. Sometimes I wish I could just be in high school all over again and not have to worry about things like money and apartments. Those songs about wanting to go back are true. But what scares me is to think that they are right, and I'm only 20. Really, that's scary to think that you want to go back 3 years and just stay in your parent's house, and have no real worries. Maybe that's just me and my fear of the "real world." I wish I had the ease of some other 20 year olds who get to tour Europe, and mommy and daddy send money and pay rent. But that won't happen. I guess at the end of my life I'll get to say that I did it my way.

*Also congrats to two great friends of mine that got married recently! You know who you are!*

So I have this blog...

So a few years ago I got a Facebook page. I figured that since many of my friends were getting it, then maybe I should too. Along the same lines as if they jumped off a bridge and what not, but quite as drastic. Though base jumping would be fun. But I'm getting off track. ANYWAY I thought I would get Facebook because everyone was on it, and it was the cool new thing. I was becoming disillusioned with MSN chat, and somehow my email address got out and I kept getting requests from people I didn't know. Now I'm all for making friends in strange places, but the fact that I had no way of knowing these people just freaked me out. At least with Facebook I could know who I was talking to, and see a picture of them. I don't know why, but it made me feel better. So I had this all through high school, and then a few years later Twitter came about. Now I never thought that anyone would want to hear me talk about different things, and that my life wasn't interesting enough for Twitter. It was something that people with interesting lives did, and well my senior year of high school I was focused on college, and figuring out what I was going to major in, and what college I was going to go to, yadda yadda yadda. I had a small group of friends, who were fantastic, and we always tried to get together on the weekends to do stuff, usually get food, go to someones house and play board games, and end the night by 10 or 11. We weren't party animals, and that was ok. We knew people who were and decided that wasn't for us. So another few years go by and more social media tools came about, but they never interested me. 
This last year though I took a class devoted to social media. One of the requirements was that if we did not have a Twitter account already, then we needed to sign up for one. Which was me. When I first signed up for it, I never thought that I would use it much. Just a few times to keep it active, but again, I never thought that I was interesting enough to justify having one. Then I started using it, seeing some other friends on there, and following celebrities that I liked.  I realized that this was more than some place I can go for celebrity gossip, but that I could say things, and people would listen. Now I only have a few followers, but still, those faithful 5 could see my thoughts. I never realized how powerful of a tool this could be. It is amazing to see how much help the victims of recent disasters got, just by people posting to their Twitter accounts places to donate money, and celebrities using their accounts to reach their thousands of followers. This is a tool that could affect major change. 
Which brings me to this blog. Being a comm major I kind of failed on the social media side of things. While I may not go into public relations, I still need to be current with this stuff, and well I was lacking. It's been said that if you cannot keep up with technology, then you will be left behind. Again, I didn't think that I was interesting enough to justify a blog. But then I started reading some friend's blogs, and realized that I don't have to be interesting, that there are people out there who would read this because they care about me. Besides if anything it can help my writing, which is always a good thing. 
So there you go. I'm not saying that I lead an extraordinary life, but it's mine and it should be documented. Whether you think I'm interesting doesn't matter, but what does matter is that you took the time out of your day to read some of my thoughts. Thank you.